


Part 4

by Writer_Lethogica



Series: The Sam and Cas Show [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-13
Updated: 2013-12-13
Packaged: 2018-01-04 12:19:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1080940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writer_Lethogica/pseuds/Writer_Lethogica
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam Winchester is your average lawyer in a humdrum small town. And Cas is his brother-in-law whose down on his luck. Cas has lost his job at the church and is now a sales associate at a gas station. He wants to keep it a secret while his husband Dean is helping out the Japanese branch of the car company he’s vice president of because he doesn’t want to worry him. But Sam has found out! Now, Sam and Cas have to live under one roof, trying to keep the secret as Cas looks for a better job. Will Dean ever find out? It’s the sitcom that will touch all our hearts and funny bones. It’s the Sam & Cas Show!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Part 4

**Author's Note:**

> Just doing this series for fun, so no beta. Enjoy! :)

Sam blinked, staring rudely at the bizarre array of characters before him. They were all dressed up in medieval attire with fantasy dashes to them, from elven warriors to queens of Moondor. All Sam could do was raise an eyebrow at his coworkers.

“Oh, _come on_ , Sam, you know you want to! Your brother LARPs all the time!” said Charlie, fiddling with her crown.

“ _What_?”

“You don’t know?” said Charlie, “He’s usually my right hand man. He’s the Fionnbhárr to my Arthur. Cas is usually his Lancelot. He can be a very dreamy guy, that Cas, even for a gal like me.”

Sam looked surprised.

“ _Nah_.”

Nobody burst into laughter. Nobody said _Silly moose, you actually believed that_? They just stood there, smiling.

“Noooooooooo, my brother’s not a weirdo who dresses up and plays knight in shining armor,” said Sam his face twisting into DO NOT WANT.

“Cas finds it hot,” said Charlie, her eyebrows moving up and down.

“I CAN’T UNHEAR THAT. I CAN’T UNIMAGINE THAT. AH, WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?” groaned Sam, his face in his hands. He could hear the group laugh.

“Because it’s fun, of course,” said Balthazar, snickering, “Now, are you going to come with us on the team building trip or what?”

“NO!”

“Suit yourself, Sam,” said Becky, shrugging, “You would have been so cute as a Dark Elf.”

“ _STOP LOOKING AT SAMMYPOO_!” hissed Jess, her crazy coming out a bit as she shoved Becky to the ground. Nobody paid heed to Becky as she lay there for a few moments, Jess just staring into nothingness as her eye twitched and breathed heavily. Sam suddenly felt extremely awkward.

“Uh…I’m just…I’m just going to go…yeah.”

And with that, Sam left the crazy people, Jess still breathing heavily with a twitchy eye.

*****

Sam walked back into the house to find Cas lying on that same couch. Sam gave him a judging look.

“What do you do all day? Lay there and pine for Dean?” asked Sam.

“Yes, Sam, I’ve just been laying here, jerking off to a photo of your brother topless with a cowboy hat on,” said Cas deadpan.

Sam went silent again, giving his second DON’T WANT face that day. Cas popped his head up from the couch.

“God, you silly moose, should I buy you a book on sarcasm? I’m sure I can find you a _Sarcasm for Dummies_ ,” said Cas. There was a lingering aftertaste of DON’T WANT on his face as he walked into the room and leaned on the wall.

“But seriously, Cas, what do you do all day?” asked Sam.

“I should be asking you where you’re back so early. Don’t you have work? Don’t tell me you’re quitting? I worked so hard to get you that job,” whined Cas.

“You called your cousin and asked him to slap me onto his payroll,” said Sam.

“I had to…dial stuff…with my _HANDS_ ,” said Cas, extending his hands towards Sam’s directions and doing spirit fingers.

“You’re not answering the question,” said Sam, crossing his arms. Cas mumbled something to himself so quietly that Sam couldn’t hear it.

“Huh? Say that again, Cas.”

“I said I’ve been _waiting for a call from Dean_ ,” said Cas through his teeth, embarrassment and annoyance coursing through his voice, “ _I’m always waiting for a call from him_.”

He stopped for a moment, twiddling his fingers.

“Because I can’t imagine how Dean would feel if he called and it went to voicemail. I’d die if I didn’t hear his voice the instant he wanted to talk to me,” grumbled Cas, a nicer hint to his voice. Sam couldn’t help but smile. Cas glared at him.

“Oh, shut up, I love my husband, deal with it,” said Cas gruffly, sitting up, “Now answer my question.”

Sam looked confused at Cas.

“Uh…what question?” asked Sam.

“Why are you back so early? Don’t you have some sketchy business to deal with for Balthy?” asked Cas. Sam sighed, sitting down next to Cas.

“I mean, I probably _should_ be working on that case of hiding Suzy Lee—ooh, I was supposed to be hush hush about that—”

Cas rolled his eyes.

“Oh please, who am I going to tell, Anna?”

“Yes?”

“Of course I am. It’s too late to undo that problem, I’m going to be sinking ships with these lips. Now, go on.”

“Well, they all wanted to do this weird team building exercise where they go LARPing in Moondor. Freaking weirdos. And Jess…started to act _weird_ again. Like…Dingo at my baby cra—”

Before Sam could finish his sentence, Cas jumped to his feet.

“YOU’RE SAYING THEY WENT TO MOONDOR WITHOUT ME? WITHOUT _LANCELOT_?”

“Wait…no…that can’t be…what they said was _true_?” said Sam, his whole image of cool Cas drowning in metal chainmail. Cas rushed upstairs, shouting, “TO MOONDOR! I SHALL NOT FAIL YOU NOW, QUEEN CHARLIE!”

“YOU’RE RUINING MY LIFE, CAS! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE THE COOL BROTHER, _YOU WERE_. I mean, yeah, you were supposed to be the awkward brother _too_ , BUT YOU WERE THE COOL ONE!”

Cas ran down the stairs, clad in his dorkdom.

“YOU’RE WEIRD IS SHOWING!” shouted Sam.

“LIKE YOU DON’T WANT TO BE AS AWESOME AS ME!” retorted Cas, running out the door and dialing what Sam supposed was Charlie. Or Balthazar. Or someone. Or something. Sam groaned. What the hell was wrong with his family?

Suddenly the phone rang. Sam glanced at the caller ID. He picked up the phone.

“Hey, Dean,” said Sam.

“Hey, Sammy. Is Cas around?” asked Dean. Sam’s heart sank.

“Oh, uh…sorry, Dean, you just missed him.”

“Oh,” said Dean, sighing, “Where is he?”

Sam winced. He didn’t like letting his brother down, even if it wasn’t really his fault.

“Moondor?” said Sam, a bit unsurely. Dean swore.

“I didn’t know I was going to miss a LARPing session! This _sucks_!”

“Oh god, you’re seriously into that?” said Sam.

“Well, Charlie was _really_ into it and she wanted me and Cas to try it out, and at first, Cas was pretty reluctant, but it looked pretty fun to me and—shut up, I can hear you laughing on the other side of the phone,” hissed Dean.

“Sorry,” snickered Sam, “I just can’t believe you’re getting weirder by the year. Why are you dragging Cas down with your weirdom, anyways?”

“For your information…I promised to take up knitting with Cas if he tried out LARPing for me,” mumbled Dean quickly. Sam began to laugh uncontrollably.

“The dude loves his sweaters, okay? I can’t deny him his freaking sweaters,” hissed Dean.

“Okay, Dean.”

“Shut up, moose, I can hear that tone.”

Sam kept laughing.

“We do couple things. Because we are a _couple_. _We’re married_. SHUT UP, I do what Cas tells me to do. I like it when he’s happy, his smile is contagious, and he does this thing where he scrunches up his nose, and it’s adorable, _dammit_ , it’s _freaking adorable_.”

“Okay, okay, stop telling me this gush, I don’t want to know these things about Cas. Why do you all want to scar me for life. First Charlie, then Balthy, then Jess, then Cas and I’ve—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa—Jess? Do tell, Sammy.”

Sam sighed.

“I…I don’t wanna talk about it,” grumbled Sam, kicking the air like some five year old.

“No, no, you don’t get to get out of this, Sammy. You’re the first person I’ve heard speaking English to me all day. You’re going to tell me things that amuse me,” said Dean. Sam groaned.

“Okay, fine, fine.”

Sam’s Dean senses were tingling. Dean was all smiles, grinning that assbutt smile of his, Sam could just _tell_. Sam rolled his eyes.

“Okay, so Jess might have…Pushed Becky to the ground after Becky said a comment about me, screamed _STOP LOOKING AT MY SAMMYPOO_ and stood over her menacingly, staring off into nothingness as her eye twitched.”

All Sam could hear on the other side of the phone was laughter.

“Dean, this isn’t funny, she was _super creepy_.”

“You like them crazy, don’t you, Sammy?”

Sam could just imagine his brother giving him a suggestive look. He closed his eyes, trying not to think about it.

“Shut up, Dean,” grumbled Sam.

“Oh, come on, you can’t say you never thought about it? Sleeping with a crazy girl?”

“So, what, Dean, she can burn me in my sleep?” asked Sam incredulously.

“You’d have to admit,” Dean said, trying to hold in his laughter, “It would be… _hot_.”

“Good god, Dean, this is not the time for puns!” said Sam in a loud whisper.

“But, seriously, Sam, you must have liked that a little. I mean, I know how much you liked her,” said Dean.

 _Okay, maybe a tiny bit_. Not like he would tell Dean that.

“Shut up, Dean,” said Sam, rubbing his forehead.

“Hey, but why’s Cas going to Moondor on a weekday, though? Shouldn’t he be working at the church? Or, doing research for some charity stuff for the church? Isn’t that bitch of a Father going to chew Cas out if he doesn’t—what’s the name—Father Pellegrino?”

Sam jumped.

 _Act cool, act cool, act cool_.

“Uh…he got…the day off today?”

 _Oh god, Dean’s totally going to see through this_.

“Sounds legit,” said Dean, and Sam could swear he could just see Dean shrug. Sam did a silent victory dance.

 _Nailed it_.

“Well, I’m going to call Cas and walk him through the plans of action he’s supposed to take if I’m not there. Just to make sure he remembers,” said Dean. Sam nodded.

“Okay, talk to you later, Dean,” said Sam.

“Bye.”

And with that, Sam was left to do whatever he pleased for the rest of the day.


End file.
